Fund My Lifestyle

Weekly Buzz

Vince Staples is apparently fed up with people telling him what to do. So he posted a Go Fund Me page for his early retirement seeking $2 million in exchange he is offering to "shut the fuck up forever" with no new songs or interviews. Stating that he wants people to "get off my dick or fund my lifestyle" which seems like a more vulgar version of the arguments you have with your parents as a teenager when you are ready to get your own place. He says he would use the money to buy things such as a Honda, a puppy, and soups for the homies. 

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New Beats
Get the fuck off my dick - Vince staples

Throwback of the Week
Everybody Drunk as Fuck - Ludacris 

Old school
Triumph - Wu-Tang Clan

Fun Facts

21 Savage said he is no longer going to wear jewelry as he wants to make things like buying houses and investing in business cool for young people instead of jewelry.

Teenage Rapper Lil Xan made headlines and enemies when he called Tupac's music "boring" this week.

Tupac's music is not boring and only an idiot would think so

“Here, let me put it like this… in the sky, there are a million stars, but when the sun appears, you see none of them. I am the sun.”

— KRS-One

Bonus

• SELF MADE - Lil Yachty
• Man Down - Rihanna
• Mathmatics - Mos Def

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Rocky Ross

Weekly Buzz

This week Rick Ross was hospitalized in serious condition after what appears like a heart attack. Although 50 Cent seems to think it was drug related, posting that a pic of Ivan Drago on isnta famous for saying "if he dies he dies". Then later doubling down on insulting Ross while he was still hospitalized. Should be plenty of fuel for the fire for this feud going forward. 

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New Beats
Top Off - DJ Khaled

Throwback of the Week
Who Do You Love - YG

Old school
1st of the month - Bone Thugs

Fun Facts

Quavo and Eric the Jeweler are no longer feuding as Quavo has paid up the 10k he owed him.

“Real killers and hitters would rather live nameless”

— Rick Ross

Bonus

• Litty - Meek Mill
• Aquainted - The Weeknd
• Solitare - Gucci Mane

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Survey Says Mr. West is in the Building

Weekly Buzz

America's future First Family is heading to Family Feud as Team West will take on team Kardashian/Jenner. Be sure to set your DVRs when the episode airs as it is sure to be entertaining to watch them try to guess what one hundred average people would think.

In other news Young Thug posted that he is changing his name to "SEX", which suggests that he doesn't understand the concept of Search Engine Optimization. He has also said that he will not produce any new music for the rest of the year in support of his deaf brother. This would be a big change for one of the most prolific rappers in the game, perhaps his name change suggests he intends to be prolific in a different way.

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New Beats
Cigarette - RAYE

Throwback of the Week
The Worst Guys -Childish Gambino

Old school
Another - Biggie Smalls

Fun Facts

YoungBoy Never Broke Again has been arrested for kidnapping. Guess ransom isn't the best plan for never being broke again. 

Talib Kweli once DJ'd at a BET party playing gansta rap and Prince walked up to him and said "I ain't get dressed up to out and hear curses."

“The easiest and the hardest word to say is NO”

— Chuck D

Bonus

• Grief - Earl Sweatshirt
• Pretty Boy - Lil B
• All Falls Down - Kanye

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Stormi Weather

Weekly Buzz

Rapper Travis Scott and Kylie Jenner had their baby after months of pregnancy rumors, I absolutely realize that nobody reading this who didn't already know that doesn't care.  They decided to name her Stormi after Pornstar Stormy Dainiels who has been in the news lately and was a real inspiration for the couple. An interesting choice for an interesting couple. 

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New Beats
X - Schoolboy Q

Throwback of the Week
Love Me - Lil Wayne

Old school
For The Love of $ - Bone Thugs

Fun Facts

Kendrick is banning photos at his live shows.

In addition to Kendrick working heavily on the album for Black Panther, TI and Chance the Rapper have been helping people get free tickets to see the movie.

“Came a long way from ramen noodles, mm”

— Young Thug

Bonus

• Welcome to Heartbreak - Kanye West
• Be Alone - Childish Gambino
• Room 27 - Rejjie Snow

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G$'s Valentines Day Special

Weekly Buzz

Rapper Travis Scott and Kylie Jenner had their baby after months of pregnancy rumors, I absolutely realize that nobody reading this who didn't already know that.  They decided to name her Stormi after Pornstar Stormy Dainiels who has been in the news lately and was a real inspiration for the couple. An interesting choice for an interesting couple. 

Back these year and expanded to over 10 hours of music to get you all the way through Valentines Day is my curated Valentine's playlist for all your activities. LINK

A playlist featuring Miles Davis, Kenny G, D'Angelo, and others

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“Baby you my Everything, all I ever wanted”

— Drake

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Quavo Running The Jewels

Weekly Buzz

Not content with being dragged on this platform last week Post Malone came out to whine about how being a white rapper is "a struggle". It must be so tough for him being the first white rapper, having such SLIM odds in the SHADY music industry. Black rappers have it so easy like Meek Mill who recieved two years in prison for a failed drug test, I can't even imagine how harsh the punishment would have been if he was a white rapper.

Big week for the Culture and not content to have the number one album in America Quavo allegedly jumped and robbed a 30k chain off of a jeweler he got in a dispute with at a club. 

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New Beats
Pray For Me -The Weeknd & K-Dot

Throwback of the Week
Noila Clap - Juvenile

Old school
Steve Biko - ATCQ

Fun Facts

Kanye likes to play Connect 4 on tour, he said Beyoncé is the best person he's ever played against.

Rihanna's makeup line is on track to sell more than Kim Kardashian & Kylie Jenner's.

“I’d rather die than listen to you”

— Kendrick Lamar

Bonus

• God's Plan - Drake
• Too Much Jewelry - Migos
• Kids - Childish Gambino

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The 2nd Annual Grahammy Awards!

It is finally the time of year for the biggest awards in music The Grahammy's! This week the winners will are crowned and those receiving awards can have their careers changed forever. Many of these artists see this award as their assent to the top of their field. 

And the awards go to...

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Duo/Duet that would make the least watchable sex tape

Post Malone & 21 Savage - Rockstar

Post Malone was an obvious contender for this category because he looks like if the hair stuck in the drain of a biker bar came to life.  The amount of tattoos involved in this would make for the world's worst cartoon when their bodies touched. I don't know if they would both take their grills out before they started kissing but either way would make for some unsettling footage. 

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Duo/Duet that would make the Most watchable sex tape

Cardi B & Offset - Lick

As the most probable sex tape to come out it would also be the most watchable because they are both in love. I mean the song they made together is called Lick.

“I turn Offset on
I told him the other day
Man, we should sell that porn”

— Cardi B in MotorSport

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Best Songwriting

Jay-Z - 4:44

The culmination of the story begun by Beyoncé's Lemonade about Jay-Z cheating on her. This song finishes the real life drama played out before everyone from his perspective. A tale of temptation and regret culminating in guilt and pain. 

“And if my children knew, I don’t even know what I would do
If they ain’t look at me the same
I would prob’ly die with all the shame”

— Jay-Z

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Song to leave in 2017

No Character to Clear - Mr. B the Gentleman Ryhmer  

Chap Hop is still producing music and this genre should definitely die and be left in the past. If you aren't familiar (luck you) Wikipedia defines it well as "music originating from England that mixes the hip hop genre with elements from the Chappist or steampunk subcultures and stereotypical English obsessions such as cricket, tea and the weather". This abomination of satire and Hip Hop should be left behind. It is so bad I did not in the playlist at the end. 

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Best Debut Album

Yesterday's Gone - Loyle Carner

A strong candidate for album of the year is even more impressive considering it was his first album. If you didn't get a chance to listen to this last week when it was nominated I highly recommend it. This relaxing album is a near perfect mix with an English accent, what more could you want?

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Best Track

Bodak Yellow - Cardi B

Storming onto the scene this year in a dominating fashion. She became the first woman to have five singles in the Billboard top 10. She also has hands down the best Twitter in the game, hopefully she can keep up the momentum for when she drops her first full length album. 

“If I see you and I don’t speak, that means I don’t fuck with you
I’m a boss, you a worker, bitch, I make bloody moves”

— Cardi B

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Album of the Year

Kendrick Lamar - Damn

It isn't really fair to the other artists when Kendrick decides to put out an album. I think they all just let out a heavy sigh hoping maybe next  time they won't release music in the same year as him. Better luck next year to the field as they won't just be competing for runner-up.

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Grahammy Nominees for Rap Album of the Year

It is finally the time of year for the biggest awards in music The Grahammy's! This week nominees for Album of the Year are announced with the winner chosen next week in addition to the winners for other categories as well. Take a listen to these great albums and maybe your favorite will be chosen for Album of The Year.

I've complied the best track from each of the nominated albums into a playlist, as well as the entire album for each Artist. These albums were chosen for the quality of the entire album from beginning to end so I highly recommend listening to the entire album if you enjoy any of the tracks in the playlist below.  Also remember to hit the Subscribe button above if you haven't already to get an email reminder when the winner is announced next week!

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Kendrick Lamar - Damn

Best Track - DNA

An album so good it can be listened to in reverse order. Like all of Kendrick's albums the planning and links between the songs leave you with new details and takeaways every time you listen to it.  

“The great American flag is wrapped in drag with explosives
Compulsive disorder, sons and daughters
Barricaded blocks and borders
Look what you taught us!
It’s murder on my street, your street, back streets”

— XXX

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Future - HNDRXX

Best Track - Coming Out Strong

As usual Future released a lot of music this year with this album being his finest work. It has a great flow to it and can suit whatever mood you are in.

“Oh, let’s not be alone
Empty thoughts fill the room
Breathe for me and I’ll breathe for you”

— Selfish

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Loyle Carner - Yesterday's Gone

Best Track - Mean it in the Morning

This debut album is incredibly impressive, it's mellow tones and heartfelt storytelling really takes you on a journey every time you listen to it. A perfect album to listen to when you are trying to relax after a long day.

“It’s been a minute since I’ve been with some women
Not ‘cause they been lacking, just I’ve been lacking the feeling
I’ve been staring at the ceiling”

— Damselfly

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BROCKHAMPTON - SATURATION III

Best Track - BLEACH

This is definitely an album that has a sense of joy and fun to it. A lot to like from this group as they released THREE albums this year. We will see if they can keep up the quality and quantity in 2018 as they are currently on a prolific pace. 

“They gave me mood stabilizers but when I came off ‘em, I was violent
Took the drugs that I wanted which didn’t help with the voices
They just grew louder and louder
They called the people who’d just chatter and chatter
I juggle all my personalities”

— SISTER/NATION

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Drake - More Life

Best Track - Madiba Riddim

A surprising album from Drake as this album utilizes a different style of beats than his prior albums. It has a tropical feel to it and is best enjoyed when the weather is nice. 

“I’ve been down so long, it look like up to me
They look up to me
I got fake people showin’ fake love to me”

— Fake Love

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Wingstop & Frisk

Weekly Buzz

Last week retailer H&M got in hot water for featuring a product photo for a hoodie that read "Coolest Monkey in the Jungle" on a young black child. The juxtaposition of it next to a white child in a hoodie with "Jungle Survival Expert" on it wasn't especially helpful. The Weeknd who was a celebrity spokesperson for H&M has dropped the brand and publicly condemned them over the picture saying he was "deeply offended". Diddy has offered the model a $1 million modelling contract for his Sean Jean brand to help "put some respect on it". If The Weeknd is looking for a new clothing retailer to get behind, Abercrombie could be a good fit for him, not because they would never accidentally shoot an insensitive photo, but because they don't shoot photos of the clothes on kids for the product page of the website at all. No room for potential issues there. 

In lighter news, An aspiring rapper robbed a Wingstop last week in hopes of getting noticed by Rick Ross who owns many of the franchises. It appears that Drake got tattoos of Steph Curry and Kevin Durant's numbers on his arm. That's going to be a bit awkward next time he is chilling with LeBron or pretending to be a big Raptors fan.

Also last week Ray J has been sued for $30 million in a moped scooter lawsuit. Allegedly, Ray J said he would invest in someone's scooter business and then stole their ideas and started his own. Not the first time Ray J has gotten in bed with somebody to work on a project then it ended up releasing to their surprise and resulting in a massive lawsuit. 

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New Beats
Pause - 21 Savage

Throwback of the Week
Crank That - Soulja Boy

Old school
Me Against The World - 2Pac

Fun Facts

2 Chainz and Snoop are setting up a basketball game between some top rappers during the NBA All Star Weekend next month in LA.

Denzel Curry did karate for 5 years

“RIP to MLK, he was a born leader
Malcolm X, Mandela, them my damn people”

— Gucci Mane

Bonus

• A Dream - Common
• Frozen - Wu-Tang Clan
• The Fight - Bone Thugs-n-Harmony

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K Dot x Lupe FiascNO

Weekly Buzz

Another frosty week passes and another petty jealous rapper throws jabs at the throne. This week Lupe Fiasco is upset because Kendrick Lamar's album cover for his single too closely resembles the album cover for Lupe's upcoming album. Lupe felt it necessary to take shots at Kendrick "K. Dot is not a top tier lyricist to me and my standards when it comes to punchlines and bars". That is a really great analysis of Kendrick, his punchlines in his last two albums that grappled with the issues of racial identity and systematic discrimination were not particularly hilarious. Kendrick isn't top tier in the same way Spielberg isn't top tier, because I didn't find Schindler's List, Lincoln, or The Color Purple funny. It is a well known fact that Kendrick Lamar draws most of his artistic inspiration from Lupe Fiasco's Instagram account, so it is entirely plausible that he stole the idea for the album cover from there. 

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New Beats
Don't do it - N.e.r.d

Throwback of the Week
Live Your Life - T.I.

Old school
Simon Says - Pharoahe Monch

Fun Facts

Childish Gambino had his second child with his girlfriend this week.

A very white man lost $3,200 on Jeopardy last week because he put a hard "r" at the end of  "Gangsta" for Coolio's classic hit Gantsta's Paradise.

“I got a lot of livin’ to do before I die
And I ain’t got time to waste”

— 50 Cent

Bonus

• Facey - Yuri Joness
• Scrolling - Dave B
• Fuck Ugly God - Ugly God

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Bringing in the New Year

Weekly Buzz

Some of your favorite rappers really got into the Christmas spirit this year spreading cheer, both by singing loud for all to hear and through acts of charity. TI spent $20k to help moms get their Christmas gifts, and Chance the Rapper hosted a "Night at the Museum" fundraiser to help the homeless that included a performance of the Chicago Children's Choir and free tickets for underprivileged students. 

Lil Bow Wow claimed in an interview this week that he used to date Kim Kardashian before she was famous. He says he kept it hidden because he had never dated someone outside his race before. I also used to date Kim Kardashian before she was famous and I never told anyone. I didn't make it Facebook official because I wasn't ready to commit, definitely not because it isn't true and I'm making it up. Lil Bow Wow and I wouldn't lie about something like that. This is definitely not at all like that time a few months ago when he posted on Instagram a picture of a private jet but he actually in coach and got called out online by another passenger. 

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New Beats
Family feud - lil wayne

Throwback of the Week
The birds pt. 1 - the weeknd

Old school
Don't sweat the technique - eric b & Rakim

Fun Facts

The Migos are working on a movie and Quavo is writing the script

Rapper XXXTentacion best known for beating up his pregnant girlfriend and threatening her has been charged with 8 more felonies.

“Now, in a perfect world, I probably won’t be insensitive
Cold as December, but never remember what winter did”

— Kendrick Lamar

Bonus

• Havana - Camila Cabello
• Modern Slavery - Travis Scott & Quavo
• On Me - Quality Control

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Week 63

Weekly Buzz

Merry Christmas, last year for Christmas I compiled all the best rap Christmas music together for this week. I won't be doing that this year as I used every song that is good. Honestly, listening to all the rap Christmas music that was out there was a harrowing experience. Without a doubt rap Christmas music is the worst type of music that exists, sleigh bells should never be used as a backing track for a rap song. The amount of forced rhymes and horrible lines are insulting to the spirit of Christmas. The worst line I was exposed to and has been haunting me for the past year I will share here because misery loves company: "Frosty the snowman, had a dick of snow, He could only fuck a bitch if her pussy was real cold". That line was created by an adult man, written down, exorbitant studio fees were paid, and at least several people gave it the okay to be released to the public. That man has been nominated for a Grammy for his other work, it is my opinion that nomination be retroactively revoked.  

Best known for being a scumbag murderer, George Zimmerman is in the news this week, after threatening Jay-Z saying that he would like to beat him up and feed him to the alligators. This was caused by Jay-Z being involved in a Travon Martin Documentary. In an attempt to stoop as low as possible he also referenced his killing of Martin in his threats toward Jay-Z: "I know how to handle people who fuck with me; I have since February 2012". That is when he murdered the unarmed teen Travon Martin. 

In a shocking move, amidst multiple sexual harassment allegations Jerry Richardson, the owner of the NFL's Carolina Panthers team, is selling the franchise. This is very surprising because normally guys who erect bronze statues of themselves turn out to be such great people; Stalin, Mao, and the list goes on.

The promising part of this news is that Diddy has announced that he wants to buy the team which would be incredible. Richardson's share is only 40% and with Diddy earning more than any other person in music last year (despite making no music) it is not unrealistic that he could put an ownership group together. I can only imagine the spectacle of draft-day Diddy or him at the Superbowl. He is very passionate about football, having allegedly assaulted the UCLA strength and conditioning coach with a kettlebell after an incident involving his son on the team.

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New Beats
Bartier Cardi - Cardi b

Throwback of the Week
the motto - drake

Old school
brenda's got a baby - tupac

Fun Facts

Kendrick Lamar is going to play the College Football halftime show this year. 

The night Tupac died in Las Vegas, his fiancé Kidada Jones asked him to wear his bulletproof vest, but he told her it was too hot

“Real G’s move in silence like lasagna”

— Lil Wayne

Bonus

• Boomerang - Jidenna
• The Weekend - SZA
• Nightgowns - Tom Misch

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Week 62

Weekly Buzz

I really never intended for this section of to be constantly focused on negative news about people in the music industry. I wanted to highlight positive news and make jokes about goofy things people like Kanye do on a weekly basis. However, it is impossible to ignore the cacophony of noise being generated by the despicable actions of some people in music. Hopefully every overly negative week can be outweighed by several positive weeks in a row.   

Russel Simmons who co-founded Def Jam Records has been accused by NINE different women of sexual assault. After being accused by a pick up basketball team worth of women of sexual assault he denied their accusations and "stepped down" from his companies. He "stepped down" in the same way professional athletes "retire" after nobody signs them for like two years, no offense Reggie Bush. Forced out seems more accurate as his companies want to disassociate from this scumbag and probably are looking forward to not being sexually harassed at work. FOUR (enough for a doubles tennis match) of the NINE women, say that Russel Simmons raped them. Since these accusations he has tried to start a #NotMe campaign on Instagram to claim his alleged innocence. I am sure that the LAPD, who have opened an official investigation into the matter, look at his #NotMe post on insta and will just be like "oh guess it wasn't him, clearly says here that it wasn't". People burnt their LeBron jersey's when he decided he prefered South Beach to Cleveland, but will they burn their horrible Phat Farm tracksuits when the owner has been sexually assaulting people on a Zeus-like pace?

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New Beats
Don't do it - N.e.r.d

Throwback of the Week
Alive - Kid Kudi

Old school
Ain't no half steppin' - big daddy kane

Fun Facts

ODB once got really drunk and stormed the stage when Methodman was performing and flipped the turntables off the stage. He later issued a halfhearted apology "Sorry, I'm an Ol' Dirty Bastard".

Kendrick watched Tupac and Dr. Dre shoot California Love in front of his house by chance as a boy, he would later sign with Dr. Dre

“I coulda died, y’all
A couple times I took my eyes off the prize, y’all”

— RTJ

Bonus

• STUPID - BROCKHAMPTON
• Man of the Year - Schoolboy Q
• The Billy Williams Story - Saba

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Week 61

Weekly Buzz

DJ Khalid's one year old son Asahd is already making waves, a frequent feature of DJ Khalid's famous Snapstory and Instagram feeds had his first magazine cover this week. This may be the earliest that anyone has ever tried to take over the rap game. 

Cardi B has somehow been posting tweets that are even better than her songs. Highly recommend a follow if you would like some insane NSFW hilarity in your life.

Lastly, Kendrick Lamar released a collector's edition of DAMN, it has all the songs in reverse order of the original release. He has said that this was premeditated when creating the album originally and he prefers the rhythm and vibe in this order. According to Kendrick: "I don’t think the story necessarily changes, I think the feel changes. The initial vibe listening from the top all the way to the bottom is...this aggression and this attitude. You know, ‘DNA,’ and exposing who I really am. You listen from the back end, and it’s almost the duality and the contrast of the intricate Kendrick Lamar. Both of these pieces are who I am." I would guess that he could re-release the same album in new orders five times before I figured out that he was messing with me and not subtly hinting at some hidden message. 

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New Beats
Um Yea - Cardi B & Offset

Throwback of the Week
Rude Boy - Rihanna

Old school
I used to Love H.E.R. - Common

Fun Facts

Common's song "I Used to Love H.E.R." tells the story of him falling out of love with a girl, but in the end it is revealed that he is actually telling the story of his relationship with hip hop.

Quavo has a card from finish line that lets him grab as many free shoes as he wants

“No sports bra let’s keep it bouncing”

— Kanye

Bonus

• Textin' My Ex - T-Pain
• Hot Chicken - Starlito
• It's a Vibe - 2 Chainz

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Week 60

Weekly Buzz

You may remember Martin Shkreli for jacking up the price of AIDS medicine from $13 to $750 dollars per pill and promptly being thrown in jail. While awaiting trial he managed to buy an unreleased Wu-Tang album for a million dollars and choosing to share it with no one else. Well it looks like the government is going to force him to release the album and any proceeds gerenreted from the release of "Once Upon a Time in Shaolin". Nice to see some new Wu-Tang music being released and being reminded that at least some scamming scumbags are in prison. Playlist Link

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New Beats

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Kamasutra - Cardi B & Juicy J

Throwback of the Week

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Favorite Song - Chance the rapper

Old School Jam

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Hit em up - 2Pac

Method Man does close-up magic.

Cardi B has offered to preform at Prince Harry's wedding for free, and citing that her Hit Bodak Yellow is ultimately a love song.

“I know if I’m generous at heart I don’t need recognition, if I’m rewarded, well that’s God’s decision”

— Kendrick Lamar

Bonus

• Stand Up - Fabolous
• Switch Places - Cousin Stizz
• GUMMY - BROCKHAMPTON

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Week 59

Weekly Buzz

I decided to change up the format and make it a little bit more official this week. R. Kelly was able to stay on brand this week by getting another lawsuit for doing something utterly despicable; mocking an autistic fan and forcing him to sing "I Believe I Can Fly". I guess he just wanted to buy some insurance for his ticket to hell. Playlist Link

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New Beats

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Throwback of the Week

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Old School Jam

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Geraldo Rivera has said "hip-hop has done more damage to young African-Americans than racism in recent years." Kendrick has clowned on him in his song YAH over this.

Quavo wants the Migos to play the hyenas in the new Lion King remake

“I’ve seen her take down that tequila
Down by the liter,
I knew I had to meet her”

— The Weeknd

Bonus

• Did You See - J Hus
• Makaveli and Eazy - Bone Thugs-n-Harmony
• Bad Boys - Stormzy